We only fear that which we do not understand.

The more we learn, the less we fear!

The less we fear, the more we try.

The more we try, the more we grow.

I’ve been thinking about how to transition my students to the idea that I may be going back to China. When I went to China the first time, my students were understandably upset. One little girl asked if it was because I liked the children in China better. She reminded me that she is Chinese-American and could even teach me Chinese if I wanted! Another child took my shoes and hid them on the playground, saying, “You can’t leave without your shoes!”

The 7-year-olds even offered to give me daily foot and shoulder massages - if only I would stay.

“Will you still read a book with me… even though you are leaving?”

What they meant was,

Do you still love me enough to take the time to snuggle up (or jump around) as we explore fantastical worlds and ideas? Do you care enough to help me understand the nuances of new words and concepts?

And if you do love me like that, why are you leaving?

They asked if I could read just one more book to them

And then pulled out Harry Potter.

***

To the children in my current kindergarten care:

I love you wild childs and I always will - unconditionally!

You have brought sunshine to my life in a dark time, and I will always think fondly of our warm Texan days together. You have taught me so many new things and I am eternally thankful for every day that we had together.

Remember that time we met that guy with four real live pythons in the grass by the castle? He even let you pet them! And while the snakes slithered around, you found treasures in the nook of a statue, possibly left by a fairy.

You re-enacted Romeo and Juliet with your stuffed animals and regularly include the Greek gods as characters in your games, thanks to those graphic novels we read together.

It might sound crazier when you’re older.

You invented your own powerful “Pokémon” as we explored your community and befriended the neighbors. That nice lady who leaves chalk outside of her house loves to see your art and your kind words! This is your world. Your neighborhood is your very own magical wonderland where the face-masked fire-fighters, police officers, and garbage-truck drivers wave whenever they see you. They always treat you with kindness and you always treat them with respect. You are learning how to treat others how you want to be treated.

You are definitely not “little kids” anymore. Maybe “middle kids.” You know how to check for cars and you know how to carry your own water bottles and face masks the whole way without losing them. That means you are responsible! But remember to cross the road as a team so that cars can see you - at least until you get a bit taller. You are a brave adventurer.

The little Chinese girl you met socially-distanced at the park calls you jie-jie 姐姐 (jee-yeah jee-yeah) or ge-ge 哥哥 (guh guh), meaning big sister and big brother. She looks up to you. In China, there was a law that people could only have one child, so many people there don’t have any brothers or sisters. That isn’t the law anymore, but lots of Chinese kids still call each other brother and sister, even if they don’t have the same parents - because it is nice to have more brothers and sisters! If you want, you can call her mei-mei 妹妹 (may-may), meaning little sister, and her little brother can be your di-di弟弟 (dee-dee) too.

Oh and remember the time when we lost the Minecraft guy? You really wanted those little toys that you saw sitting on the stairs among dozens of other trinkets - clearly laid out for kids to take. We made a deal that you could either choose one of your real toys to trade or make something to trade for the toys you wanted. It wouldn’t really be fair to the owner of the toys if we just took them without leaving something in return! They might be sad if we just took their things.

You worked so hard to make your very own toys - you used the glue gun, pompoms, pipe cleaners, pony beads, googly eyes, and glitter glue - and you worked for hours! And you made toys that you loved. Toys that were hard to let go of when it was time to trade. But you did it. You traded. You got the Minecraft guy.

But somehow it must have slipped out of your hand. Or maybe it fell out of your pocket. It was so tiny; it was hard to keep safe. We learned a lot about how to search for something lost. We retraced our steps a dozen times and you called out its name into the wind. But we suspect that it blended in with the brown leaves on the ground - it was camouflaged like a chameleon. We never found the Minecraft guy. It was really sad. But we exhausted all of our options to find him - and then we briefly reminisced about how he was a great toy and admitted that we would miss him - We discussed what might make you feel better, and then we moved forward and continued to play and learn!

I am proud of you for staying in control of your feelings. I am proud of you for being honest. I am proud of you for being brave. I am proud of you for being strong even when life is hard. Keep using your kindness to solve problems whenever possible.

Love is your most powerful magic and your greatest strength.

My job is to spread love, joy, and peace wherever I go. That is your job too. You can also be an astronomer, a parent, a game designer, a unicorn trainer, or anything else you want to be - but your most important job is to do your best to make the world better. Be your friendliest, be helpful, and trust yourself. You can do it. And when something is too hard, or if you ever forget something, your friends will be there to help and remind you with love. And you can help and remind them too with love. But it is your responsibility to be your best self.

We all face challenges in our lives, whether we want to or not. Life is not always easy or fun. Things will be confusing. Other people are especially confusing sometimes!

Confusion often triggers fear. Sometimes, when somebody doesn’t understand something, depending on how they’ve learned to respond to challenges, they may refuse to try, and they get scared. But you are learning to focus on healthy solutions when faced with conflicts, instead of being afraid. Once the confusion is unpacked, it is easier to erase the fear and solve the problem.

Some of the confusion comes from the fact that we all want what is best for each other, but sometimes the best for one person feels bad for another person. But feeling bad does not mean something is bad. It is hard to let go of our comfort zones. But that doesn’t mean it is best to stay in our comfort zones. We have learned a lot about how to compromise and solve problems so that everybody feels okay. Sometimes we have to unexpectedly change our plans because of circumstances beyond our control. Other people’s feelings are beyond our control. We can only control our own responses.

You can choose how to respond to whatever happens to you.

Here’s a real example from a few minutes ago… I spent four hours writing this (and more) when there was a sudden glitch with my computer and the entire thing got deleted! I felt really silly for not saving it. I felt disappointed. I thought I might cry. I had gotten so excited about writing my thoughts that I didn’t even think about saving them. I felt sad and then I thought for a few minutes. I realized that maybe it was for the best. I had the opportunity to explore my ideas, and now as I rewrite this, I have a chance to refine them. I get to try again, and I will try to make my writing even better. Us grown-ups are still learning - nobody is perfect at everything!

Life comes at us fast - We have talked a lot about your dear dogs, family members, and celebrities that you know died. You have learned the hard way that it is possible to separate from someone you truly love, without losing that love.

Sometimes we feel sad. But that sadness does not need to be associated with the pain of the past or a potential thing in the future. Sometimes we just feel sad, and that’s okay. It’s okay to need some time alone and it’s okay to ask for help. It’s okay to need a break or a change of pace. It’s okay to make mistakes - as long as you keep trying to do better next time! You only fail if you give up.

So never give up on your dreams. And don’t forget Dada, the most annoying green koala you’ve ever met. You can help her family continue to take good care of her. She will still need your help to learn how to make friends and spell words. If you’re not sure how to spell something for real, you can ask a grown-up or your iPad, but try your best to sound it out. You know way more than Dada does, so you can help teach her how to control her impulses!  She always has good intentions and never hurts people on purpose. Just like you.

I will miss you and I will be sure to visit whenever possible. Your parents love you so so so much that they will make sure that whoever teaches you next is a great person! Use your kindness to make them feel welcome in your homes!

I believe that you can do amazing things with your life if you just believe in yourself.

jia-you 加油 (jee-ah yo)

Love, joy, and peace, always.

***